Married

mar·ried

[mar-eed]

1. united in wedlock; wedded: married couples.

2. of or pertaining to marriage or married persons; connubial; conjugal

 

I've decided to go ahead and document my wedding day while I can remember most of the details. So in case you haven't heard it, here it is!

 

My husband-to-be/fiance' at the time was currently at Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio, Texas finishing up his tech school before he would move on to bigger and better things. While I was, at that time, in Clovis, New Mexico with my family. I knew in my heart of hearts this goofy guy was the one for me so why not go ahead and get married? We both loved each other to the moon and back, and even throughout our dating period we had been under scrutiny from certain people about us being together and we didn't care. Yes, we were young and in love. Apparently that combination signals bad flags for people...but anyways, I had the support of my mom and that was all I really needed. So step one was to figure out exactly how I could get married. We'd need a certified person to do it and a marriage certificate. So I got to work, and boy I tell you something, it was work indeed to get this certificate.

 

 

 

My stepdad was stationed at Cannon Air Force Base(All the way to the left side of the above map) now if you look all the way to the right, you'll see Texico and Farwell. Where they meet in the middle is the New Mexico/Texas state line. Farwell is in Texas and it's where we headed for my Marriage Certificate since my fiance' was in Texas as well, I needed a Texas certificate.

 

I looked into other options before as well. I asked them about a proxy marriage and having my fiance' on skype for it. They wouldn't work with me on that one. There's not many nice things I can say about the women who work at the Farwell Courthouse, other than they made it seem like they were doing me a favor since I was so young and not ready for marriage because they made it nearly impossible to get my certificate. I had to keep returning to the courthouse to give papers, or sign this, or confirm that because they kept delaying and dragging everything out.

 

 They wouldn't tell me I needed certain paperwork from my fiance' until the very last moment. At this point I had given up on the proxy marriage idea and I had a deadline. I had already bought tickets to go visit my darling in San Antonio and to not have this certificate in time would of been the most heartbreaking thing for me. The women were always so sour with me but in the end, through fighting tooth and nail it seemed, I had my marriage certificate ready to go a few days before it was time to fly out. 

 

So then I began calling the chapel on Lackland to see if a person out there could wed us, but alas I was met with the answer of "We can only marry a couple after they've gone through a 2 week pre-marital course." My heart sank, my fiance' was pretty much a full time student at the time, it would be impossible for him to fit a 2 week class into his schedule, plus I had bought a round trip ticket for a few days. So the chaplains on base were a bust. I needed to start looking into the San Antonio area for help. I called up all the Justice of the Peace' that were sort of around the base in case we had to get a taxi to go to a courthouse. The weekend I had set aside for our special day it seemed everyone was booked.

 

Now, at this point, this just felt like one thing after another. I was just so depressed because things were not looking up. I started to believe it just wasn't meant to be right now, but if anyone knows me they know I can be stubborn as a bull.

 

So I called an office and lo and behold, I got in touch with a Justice of the Peace who was free on Saturday. (I had wanted to get married on Friday, but suuure, Saturday works!!!!) and even better was He could come on base and do the ceremony! I was on Cloud 9 people, Cloud 9.

 

I started packing my suitcase and then I freaked out. I don't have a wedding dress!!! How can I get married without one?!

 

My mom just smiled at me. We went shopping and picked out cute white summer dresses. I tried one on that had a polka dot pattern and it fit perfectly. I came out of the dressing room and my mom cried. That's how you know it's the right one! Sure, it wasn't your traditional or typical wedding dress...but what part of this wedding was traditional or typical.

 

So after a hop and a skip plane ride I was on Lackland. It was Thursday and I was getting married Saturday. I couldn't believe it. I would be Mrs. Candice Conner! I loved every syllable of it. I got to visit with my darling when he got out of class and we were both anxiously anticipating Saturday.

 

After a long, grueling Friday, Saturday morning appears. We were supposed to get married at 11am. So I get ready and David comes over so we could head to where we were meeting the JOTP. We were going to get married outside the nearest chapel.

 

So it's 11am and already smoldering hot being the end of May and in south Texas. After 10 minutes we get a call from the JOTP. He went to the wrong gate, apparently that one was closed, so he'd have to loop around and find an open gate.

 

10 more minutes passes and he calls again. They won't let him get to us without a visitor's pass, which my fiance' had to sign for him. So I have no idea where anything is so I pass the phone to darling and he says we have to go to the welcome center. It's about a 20 minute walk from the chapel. So we head out in the 100+ degree heat. I'm in my pretty white summer-dress-turned-wedding-dress and cheap non supportive flip flops while my fiance' is in his full ABU's. We're overheated and starting to sweat by the time we reach the welcome center. We walk up to the front door and it's closed. We're confused. Darling calls the JOTP again and get's a Sergeant on the phone to explain the location, because it obviously wasn't the Welcome Center.

 

What we had failed to understand was it was the welcome center, but it was the welcome center for the base. It's the lovely little building that exists right outside the main gate. We had walked 20 minutes in the wrong direction. So we had to walk back and tack 10 extra minutes onto that to reach the main gate. (Lackland is a huge base.)

 

Now, every bride dreams of her Wedding day being the most beautiful day in her life. One that she is flawless and beautiful in and her husband-to-be completely falls in love with her all over again.

I was dripping sweat, my hair was sticking to my head, my make-up was running and I was as red as a tomato. I wanted to pass out as I was borderline heat exhaustion (but thankfully we had bought water bottles to bring on the walk over) 

I didn't feel the least bit beautiful....until my darling looked at me as we made it to the welcome center and he smiled at me. I cried a little bit, partly from the fact I wanted to collapse but mostly because his smile has always had a way of making everything better.

 

So we go inside and I slump down into one of the chairs, some of the guys in uniform look over at me in my pitiful state. I didn't care though. I just wanted to get back to the chapel and be Mrs. Conner! We get the JOTP his visitor's pass and we walk out to his truck, he takes one look at me and apologizes. (Yeah, I must look pretty bad if the guy we just made wait 40+ minutes is apologizing)

 

He offered to give us a ride in his 2 seater truck. So as not to get in trouble at the gate, the love of my life walks back through and I ride in with the JOTP. After we get through the gate we pick up my darling and all squeeze into the tiny truck and make for the chapel. That was probably the best air conditioning I've ever felt. We get under the patio of the chapel's front porch and I hand the Marriage certificate to the JOTP and he starts the vows for us to repeat to each other. We had written vows to each other but wanted to say them to each other in private. I don't remember much of anything that I repeated, I just remember taking his hands in mine and looking deep into my husband's eyes and it being the most heartfelt, memorable moment of my life because in that moment all I could see was him smiling at me and his eyes so full of love and utter joy that it made everything I just went through that day and every day in the past nonexistent.

 

The kind JOTP signed off our certificate and took a few pictures of us. I paid him a little extra for all the trouble because I was so thankful and felt it was deserved. The picture at the top of this post is the very first picture of Mr. and Mrs. Conner.

 

Everyone says they never forget their wedding day, and I'm fairly certain I can't forget mine. I put my heart and soul into making that day possible, and yes, it was probably one of the worst weddings ever, but it was my wedding. It was just me and the love of my life and a justice of the peace. No friends or family present and that's okay. I didn't need a fairy tale wedding, I just needed my husband to be my husband and I got just that.

 

 

 Thanks to two wonderful childhood friends, I did get a photo shoot for my 1 year anniversary in a gorgeous borrowed REAL wedding dress. I do cherish these pictures and memories of having so much fun with them as I experienced what it's like to be a beautiful bride for a day. Thank you Rachel and Gabby. (:

 

 

Now here we are a little bit over 2 years married and going strong with our first little bundle of joy due in November. I didn't get to spend the first 3 months of my marriage with my husband due to the military, and we've had our ups and downs in between then but I wouldn't trade any of it. I wouldn't trade my wedding day hardships for a fairy tale wedding and I wouldn't trade the hardships I've gone through because they've made my husband and I stronger and closer.

 

I love my life and this journey I've been on.

 

I'm not afraid to say that either! Thank you so much for support you've given to me. It really means the world to me!

 

Thank you for reading and God bless our troops and God bless America!